A Special Story - Brian and Craig
Starting a Family
Our story has been a happy one so far. In our fifth year together, Craig and I decided to start a family. We considered all our options, and settled on surrogacy as a means of having a child. From the beginning, we were hyper-aware of the challenges facing us as gay parents, and sensitive to how different our child might feel with two dads. Deep inside, however, we've never doubted we were doing the right thing. What could be more wondrous than creating and nurturing a little life? We believed then, as we do now, that our children will grow up just fine if we make a home for them that is loving, compassionate, and respectful of all of God's creations.
Being busy professionals, we chose not to spend the time trying to go it on our own. Instead, we decided to engage an agency to walk us through all the steps. You need only google the words "surrogacy agency" to discover there are many, many programs out there. This is especially true in California because of the generally favorable legal climate towards recognizing surrogacy and egg donation agreements.
At first, it seemed natural that we should sign up with an agency that dealt primarily with gay couples. After all, they would understand our special situation. But we soon realized we were not that radically different from married straight couples who desired children, but for some reason, couldn't have any. So, we broadened our search. After interviewing several agencies and speaking with other couples in similar situations, we chose the Center for Surrogate Parenting. We felt they were the most experienced, respected, and well connected of all the programs. They had a proven track record. Their staff was genuine, honest, extremely motivated, and passionate about their work. At all times, they recognized our relationship, and supported our right to have a child and raise a family. In the end, we were not only impressed with their credentials, but felt we could trust them.
Since signing on, we've made steady progress - slow at first, but accelerating once we matched with a surrogate. In its role as a matchmaker, the Center takes great care to ensure proper screening and counseling for her surrogates and couples. Once a match is made, the Center chaperones the first meeting, and if all goes well, facilitates the professional relationship until the birth of the child. Craig and I have been fortunate to have a wonderful surrogate mom to work with. She personifies many of the typical surrogate's traits - altruistic, unselfish, and driven by the desire to help a couple realize their dream of having children.
At the time of this writing, Craig and I are just over twenty weeks pregnant with one child. Thank God, the pregnancy has gone smoothly so far. Like all expectant parents, we are excited, overjoyed, and a little nervous. They say our lives will be completely and forever changed when our baby is born.
Truthfully, it already has. BRIAN AND CRAIG